So I was perusing some old files on my HD and found a stash of limericks I wrote from a long time ago.
Poor Lucy to Ricky once said,
"I'm tired of giving you head!
If I'm not in your band,
You can sleep with your hand!"
So he went and screwed Ethel instead.
But Ethel to Ricky then said,
"stop spilling your sperm on my bed!
it makes it all sticky
and smelly!" So Ricky
went off and got butt-fucked by Fred.
Then Fred said, "Hey, let's grab a beer!
There's a nice little gay bar near here!"
And so now you know
What the TV won't show--
How Ricky and Fred became queer.
The seat belt's a great thing, you know,
For driving while getting a blow.
Your girlfriend can suck
As you pass that Mack Truck
And you truly can come as you go.
As Marie Antoinette has oft said,
"Don't let the men go to your head;
If it's sex that they crave,
then lie down, but be brave,
And make them eat pussy instead."
A portly old chap, a New Yorker,
Once let loose a hell of a corker--
A terrible fart,
Which blew him apart;
He was scattered halfway to Mallorca.
Please feel free to post some limericks of your own devising!
