First of all, I NEVER saw an orthopedic doc in the first place.  I saw a neurologist, and I've been discharged from his care. 

The physical was a GENERAL physical, requiring my heart rate, blood pressure, breast exam....all that kind of good stuff that a famil practitioner is supposed to do.  The back surgery was a VERY small part of it - a single line on the form asking me to list the surgeries I've had.  An orthopedic doctor isn't going to be willing to do all of that stuff because, as you pointed out, he's a specialist, not a family practitioner, AND the kind of surgery I had wasn't an orthopedic surgery.

I walk normally, even managing to walk three or four miles at a time in under forty minutes.  I manage to run a household with three very active kids. I go grocery shopping alone and I unload the groceries from the car alone.    In the course of my work I lift and assist full grown adults in and out of beds, chairs, cars and off toilets.  I bend and lift and pull and push, all without injury to myself or significant pain - in fact, I probably do MORE than some people who haven't had spinal fusion surgery.

After the surgery, I became depressed.  Seriously depressed.  I didn't want to get out of bed, shower, talk to anyone....I used to cry whenever I woke up in the morning and saw the daylight because I simply detested life.  People were telling me that I'd never do this or that and the other again, I was in pain....life was miserable.  Then I got the neuropathy under control (that's the major cause of my pain, not my back) and I kicked myself in the arse and I MADE myself do things.  I went to work for hospice, then I went to look after the Mr and Mrs....and I decided that nothing was going to stop me; that I wasn't going to lay down and die or accept that I couldn't do this or that or the other.  Yeah, I've got a spinal fusion, and yeah, I have some nerve damage, but I'm still active and able-bodied.  I'm not in a wheelchair, and I'm not on disability.  Besides, any CNA who knows anything about anything would NEVER lift or move a patient single-handed.  You ALWAYS do it in pairs, even if your patient is 95lbs.

Grr.  I guess it was her attitude that pissed me off more than anything else.  She saw that I'd had the surgery and treated me like I had some kind of contagious disease, holding me at arms length and literally running from the room.

*sigh*

It is my will to use all of my abilities to obtain the following goal: a CNA license and certification.

It is my WILL.

As a disinterested observer, I don't think you have anything to apologize for, though it's nice that you are trying to keep things friendly.

I would just say that your attitude and spirit and refreshing and great to see.  I'm glad you don't want to accept anything as an excuse for you not getting to do what you want, how you want.  It is great that you want to be very productive and helpful for others and that should be encouraged wherever possible.

It is sad to read that the first doctor wasn't cooperative, but again, hopefully the next will be much more cooperative and supportive and will be ready to accept your goals and desires as something you can and will achieve. 

I can see it too, Dev. Trust me, I can see her POV.  I understand why she was reluctant - however, there isn't any part of my physical form that says 'do you think this person is capable of doing the physical activities required of a CNA'.  All it says is 'is the person healthy enough to complete the class'.  That's all.  There's a big difference, I think. 

I've seen people who were in worse physical shape than myself working as CNA's.  Women and men who were hundreds of pounds heavier than myself, who had a hard time walking along a hallway, let alone taking care of a patient.  It frustrates the heck out of me to see them working and know that I can do a better job than they can but because I've had a surgery to fix what went wrong during a car accident I may not ever be able to follow my dream and be a nurse.

The hospice knows I've had spinal surgery.  The agency I worked for knew I had spinal surgery.  Everyone involved knows, and nobody has had a problem with it - or HAS a problem with it. Christ, the hospice has even offered me a job once I get certified, that's how confident in my abilities they are. 

If I can't get medical clearance......well, I don't know what I'll do. 

I just don't know.