Mmm... Self-Feeding, You Say? Great!

So, our base is fairly small, as far as most military bases go, and parking has been an eternal problem. We have lots and spaces that are designated for various categories of people here. We have Staff and Faculty, Student Commuters, and On-Post Students. Like I said, lots are marked and mixed lots have spaces that are marked individually. The vast majority of spaces in the area of the schools are for Staff and Faculty with some spaces marked for Student Commuters. The On-Post students are supposed to walk to class and are not allowed to park near the schools, unless in a lot designated Open. Makes sense, so far (I hope).

Now, we always have people trying to park in spots that they shouldn't. Since parking is so limited, there have been days when I've shown up 10 minutes before the first class of the day and found every single space in my lot full. That's how it goes sometimes and I park elsewhere and walk. What bothers me is when I'm trolling the lot for a space and I see a student car in a staff spot. I caught the same car parked three days in a row in a staff spot a few weeks back. After the third day of walking from a far lot with a sprained ankle, I called the base police and asked them to issue a ticket. They did and that's the last time I've seen that car in the lot. They also issued tickets to all the students parked in staff spaces. My supervisor and I hoped that word would spread and we'd see the end of students parking in the lot for a while. Nope, more still do it. Some of them have either scraped their student stickers off or just never put one on, so now it's hard to tell if it's a new instructor that hasn't gotten a chance to get a sticker or a student.

None of this boggles my mind. We're getting to that. This is just some background ramble.

Recently, my boss and the Chief MLI of the school across from us decided that since parking was so bad and many of the staff members were complaining that they couldn't park in our lot, they would start patrolling the lot and noting cars that were parked illegally. My boss took last month and during one of his daily walk throughs, he noted half a dozen student cars in the lot. When he was ready to head in and call the police, he noticed that one of the student cars had people in it. He went over and found a couple of Airmen smoking in the car. Now, the Air Force has a really strict policy about trainees smoking on base (as in, not no, but hell no). So, not only were the breaking their own service's rule on smoking, but when he told them to move their car, they didn't (that part really blows my mind - an E3 telling an E7 no). They did get squared away.

This all brings me to the truly boggling part. HAHA! Finally there. As a response to the constant reports of cars parking in spots they shouldn't (not only from my school but from all over the base) and the incident with the smoking students, the base police have stepped up their parking lot patrols. Now, we don't have MPs here. They were phased out when Ft Ord closed a decade ago, for the most part. We have federal police, instead. So, unlike many military installations, when they issue tickets, there are fines involved. On many bases, if you get a ticket from the MPs, you get a copy of it sent to your commander and they take care of it.

In addition to having to have a sticker on your car, you also have to make sure it doesn't fade out too much. I mean, how are the police supposed to know where you are allowed to park if they can't tell where you are allowed to park? Right? Well, on a recent patrol of parking lots on the base, they issued a ton of tickets to instructors for having faded stickers. How is this mind boggling, you say? If I expect students to park where they should, I should also expect instructors to keep their stickers bright and shiny, right? Well, about two years back we changed sticker makers. People that have stickers from when I got here still have bright and shiny stickers on their cars. People that get stickers now (and for the last two years) have sun faded, barely readable stickers in about two months. That's right! Every two months they have to get a new sticker or risk getting a $45 ticket.

It's a great self-feeding policy, I think. I mean, they issue a bunch of stickers and start running low? No problem! Issue 100 tickets and we'll use the money to buy more cheap ass, fade in no time stickers to issue out to the rule breakers!

The best part? A couple of the people in my unit that got tickets had recently gone in to get new stickers and before the stingy sticker giving police officer would hand them out, they looked at the old stickers and told them they were good. Not good enough to get a new sticker, but bad enough to get a ticket days later.

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