Really, I don't have low self-confidence. I know many people who can't make up their minds don't think highly of themselves. I don't really think highly of myself either, but I'm happy with who I am. Of course, almost all of us have those few things that we would change about our physical appearance, and I'm no exception. I have long, blonde hair, but lately I've been thinking about dying it dark, dark brown. I think it would be awesome on me, especially with my dark blue eyes. So I call the local Salon and ask them if they can dye it almost black, under the condition that it will be a washout. The owner tells me that when blondes dye their hair darker it stays that way. So basically if I want dark hair, temporarily I would have to have it dyed back, which is something I'm not too thrilled about. Talk about damagem to already damaged hair. I usually don't care what people think, and I still don't, but my boyfriend was thrilled when I told him my plans to become a temporary burnette. Now really, I don't even care what he thinks... I mean, if he doesn't like me and who I am and what I'm about, that's no one's problem but his own. Yet still, that was another plus to dying my hair. Oh well, blonde am I and blonde will I remain.
So then my mom starts talking about cutting my hair and how great she'll make it look, but I'm a big coward. I'm fairly daring when it comes to other things; usually not too nervous when it comes to change, but there's something about my hair... maybe it's the fact that it took forever and a day to get my hair to my waist. But another problem is that I never even wear it down, I always pull it up, because it's so frizzy. So then I start thinking maybe I'll get a spiral perm. That'd be cool, and my hair wants to be curly but seems to need help, so maybe that's what I'll do. I'm a white girl, but cornrows would be cool, then I'd be accused of being a wigger, right? Then again, I don't care what people think either. I had my hair in braids at one point, but that was when I was younger. It stinking rocked. I didn't have to do anything for it, save wash it every other day, but now my hair is so thin on the ends that I don't think it'd work well. Plus, I don't have the time or energy to braid yard long hair. Or, maybe I should cut my hair a good couple inches and spiral curl it all over my head. That'd be pretty cute on me, I think... but it's not exactly "cute" that I'm trying to achieve. Maybe I should just dye my hair dark, permenently. Boys like dark hair anyway, right?
I think I should become a salon owner when I'm out of stupid high school. I have so many ideas of what to do, but right now, today, I'm too scared to do any of them on myself. If only hair grew an inch a day. That'd be the greatest thing! So, is that it, should I open a salon? Or would that take too much time away from my becoming a model (ha, a new recent idea I thought up!). I'm sure I'm sounding quite immature, not to mention boring, right now, so I will bore you no longer. I guess I either need to accept what God gave me or be brave enough to do something different.
