10 Pitches I Wish They'd Use To Sell Us Useless Products
1) ...And that's not all!!! Wait a minute, I guess that is all. Holy shit! That's all?
2) ...Now available with a luxurious coating of 100% pure cotton-free asbestos...
3) ...Buy one and get a free Osama Bin Ladin Pez dispenser!
4) ...Hours of fun for the whole (crime) family!
5) ...Act now and we'll thrown in a small blond boy at no extra charge...
6) ...Really gets the blood stains out of the freakin' carpet!
7) ...Call now, or a fetus will be aborted by a crazed liberal...
8) ...For the price of one grande Frappacino at Starbucks, you can help keep your Wonder Bread community Negro and Spic free and still reap the benefits of cheap labor!
9) ...We love to see you smirk...
10) ...These are hands down THE most patriotic tube socks on the market...
That's all for today folks, see you in 2005...
