Though it was only 20 some degrees on Saturday morning in Minneapolis I decided to try and get my bike out for one of the last remaining rides before the snow hits.
THE CRASH
I decided to take out the "Quad-B" (The Big, Bad, Black, Bike) my specialized Big Hit, and tear around uptown, downtown, dinkytown and the U. As I was winding around near the Mississippi not seeing anyone around I leisurely went on and off the trail jumping over small obstacles and whatnot. As I neared a fork in the path I where two paths split around a large surface of nobby cobblestone I veered to the left in hopes of jumping off part of the embankment of the other trail.
As I turned I saw that my handlebars had collided with another set of bars from a biker who I had no idea, was immediately behind me. Our bars locked for a moment and as I pulled away quickly I was tossed sideways off my bike onto the cobblestone elbow first followed by my knee. Fortunately I didn't pull the other biker down with me who was not wearing a brain bucket like I was (I've hit my head on enough thing to know better by now).
I checked my bike and body and though I had great soreness in my elbow and knee I escaped with little blood loss. Plus the only damage my bike received was a few scratches and the chain came off. The other guy had stopped just a few feet ahead of me to make sure I was alright and I laughed it off a bit with him since we recognized we were both at fault for the crash. I was moving onto a path intended for travel in the opposite direction and he was passing in close proximity with no verbal warning.
I hopped back on, shot across the mississippi happy that I had finally taken a good fall and got away relatively unscathed despite the ground that broke my fall and headed towards Dinkytown.
BRA #1
As I crossed over the freeway I noticed a very large pink bra in the road...not something one sees very often but it gave me a good smile and pedalled on towards the U. I shot a few stair gaps (nothing very impressive) and was taking another ramp drop by the U when I noticed a large sign stating that heavy fines would be issued to anyone caught "stunt biking" on the premises. As I saw a few University squads pull up to where I was biking I decided I had pushed my luck far enough and proceeded back to the streets.
BRA #2
While winding through Dinkytown I saw a second large bra which could easily be worn by the owner of the pink bra I had encountered earlier. Or at least I was able to estimate in my brief encounters with each bra.
THE MORAL
Unfortunately I found no large breasted braless woman walking around that day, but I did escape a potentially dangerous crash safe and sound and avoided all legal reprimands despite my innocent illegal activity.......and that's just as good, well, almost.
To see a similar article about an enormous bra please search "enormous bra" at The Onion archives www.theonion.com/back_issues/
Love Suspeckted
