> > I was against the first Iraq war, I am against the second Iraq war, but
I
> > voted for it. Now I'm against it but I was for it. I support the UN. I'm
> > against terrorism and against the Iraq war. But I voted for the Iraq
war.
> > So, I voted against the first war and supported the second war, wait...
> >
> > I'm against gay marriage but for gay unions. I support gays but think
the
> > San Francisco mayor is wrong. I support gay marriages. No, wait, gay
> > unions. I'm Catholic. Wait, I'm Jewish. My dad was Jewish. But I was
> > raised Catholic. What am I?
> >
> > I don't want to confuse people. I am for abortions, but wait, I'm
> > Catholic, and Catholics are pro-life. But I might
> > consider putting pro-life judges in office, but I'm not sure. I do know
I
> > voted for a pro-life judge, but I stated that it was a mistake.
> >
> > I went to Vietnam. But I was against Vietnam. I testified against fellow
> > US troops in Vietnam, threw my medals away and led others to do the
same.
> > But I am a war hero. Against the war. I stated I threw my medals away
> > then I threw my ribbons away. I then revealed that I threw my ribbons
away
> > but not my medals, then lately I stated that I threw someone else's
> > medals away and never threw anything of mine away. I believe Ribbons and
> > medals aren't the same thing. Medals come with ribbons, so now I believe
> > that ribbons and medals are the same thing, besides the fact that
ribbons
> > are cloth and
> > medals are medal.
> >
> > I wrote a book that pictured the US flag upside-down on its cover. But
> > now I fly and campaign in a plane with a large flag right-side up on it.
> > But sometimes, we fly upside-down for fun.
> >
> > Yasser Arafat is a hero and a statesman. The Israelis shouldn't kill
> > Palestinian terrorists, but they should stop terrorism. Yasser Arafat is
a
> > terrorist supporter. I support Mideast peace.
> >
> > I am for the common man, unlike Bush. I am against the rich. But my
family
> > is worth 700 million dollars, has a jet and many SUVs. I am the common
> > man.
> >
> > I am against sending jobs overseas. My wife is a Heinz heir. Heinz has
> > most factories offshore. I am against rewarding companies for exporting
> > jobs as long as it
> > is not Heinz. I own $1 million in Wal-Mart stock. I believe Wal-Mart is
> > evil by driving small business owners out of town. I am a capitalist and
> > I own part of Wal-Mart but I am a good guy for small corporate America.
> > I own SUVs when I talk to my followers in Detroit, MI. Teresa owns SUVs,
I
> > don't, when I talk to tree hugging followers. I have a campaign jet that
> > gets 1/3 mpg, which is great fuel efficiency.
> >
> > I am against making military service an issue in presidential elections.
I
> > defended a draft dodger Clinton and stated that all serve in their own
> > capacity whether they draft dodge or not. Did I mention, I served in
> > Vietnam and am a hero? Are you questioning my patriotism?
> >
> > I served in Vietnam. My opponent didn't. I have three purple hearts! I
am
> > a hero. I am qualified to run this country since I served.
> >
> > I spent Christmas of 1968 in Cambodia, being shot at by the drunken
South
> > Vietnamese and the Khmer Rouge, while president Nixon was lying to the
> > country and saying that there were no troops in Cambodia.
> >
> > What's that you say, Nixon wasn't president in 1968, well it must have
> > been some other president then. Who was the president that awarded me
> > with the phony silver star, it was probably him. Are you sure the Khmer
> > Rouge were
> > not active until 1970, well I guess I must not have been there then.
> >
> > That's right I was actually in my base camp in Vietnam at least 55 miles
> > from the Cambodian border and I spent the evening writing in my journal
> > about being in Cambodia. I got confused after I said it so many times
> > between 1968 and 1986.
> >
> > I am a real hero though, just spend three minutes with the people who
> > served with me and they will tell you. No, not those 200 plus veterans
who
> > served with me and say I lied, and not all those veterans that signed
> > affidavits that say I am a phony, I mean just these 8 people that travel
> > around with me (my band of brothers).
> >
> > I am John Kerry. I want to be your President.
