I got out of class early today. I finished what I needed to, got my grade (an A, in case you're interested) and decided that rather than dawdle around in school, I'd catch an earlier train home.
As I was walking past the bookstore, I became aware of a man walking next to me. His pace was slightly faster than mine, and as he walked past me I turned to look at him.
He literally took my breath away. Tall, but not lanky, slim - toned, athleticically slim, not hipster herion-skinny - with dark curly hair and gorgeous blue/green eyes. He was an adonis, and I after a few yards I found that I had stepped up my pace so that I could look at him some more.
He had a slight stubble on his face, which I adore. For some reason, that stubble made me imagine waking up with him on a Sunday morning, our arms and legs tangled up in each other, his face pressed into the back of my neck. I have to tell you that the thoughts that ran through my mind as I watched him walk were not befitting of a married woman....they weren't xxx rated; they were erotic. Me, wearing his shirt - and only his shirt.... him taking my hand as we walk....my hands in that dark curly hair. He was so fucking beautiful.
Beautiful. And, a professor at the college, which means he's smart....and I adore smart. Smart beats looks, period.
He stopped at the door of his classroom, and I turned me head to stare as I walked by. He was in the middle of a gaggle of students who were telling him why they didn't/couldn't do their homework, but he did look up and for a brief second our gaze met and my heart jumped. Then he looked away, and my heart fell. Who am I kidding, thinking that a man as beautiful as him would think that a stumpy little podge like me was worthy of his time and attention. Besides, I'm married. It's not as if I'd be able to do anything with his attention should I gain it; trying to get him to notice me would ultimately be an exercise in futility, but goddam, that man is beautiful.
I am incredibly tempted to make myself available at the same time, in the same place next Wednesday just so I can catch a glimpse of him again. I swear, I have never seen such beauty in a man and I am so struck by it I can hardly find the words to express it.
God, that man is beautiful, and I wish he were mine.
