This is not uncommon many of us have racist and or homophobic parents or grandparents, segregation wasn’t that long ago and open homosexuality rather recent as well. For the targets of racism progress can’t come fast enough but objectively it is happening quite fast. Children’s almost instinctual desire to be different from there parents is one reason for this.

Younger racists are mostly drawing on personal experience to justify their beliefs. However I don’t think a cab driver whose been robed 5 times by black males is racist if he exhibits trepidation for taking another black male fare. Eyesight is our main, first, and most reliable sense for gauging whether or not someone or something is a threat to us. This will not change until certain stereotypes have no bases in fact.

Homosexuals as a group have the unchallengeable bible as an unfortunate hurtle on their road to acceptance. Difficult to say how long that will take.

I know this is somewhat off topic, just a pet peeve of mine, but I really hate the wanton misuse of the term "homophobic". Phobic means "fear", not dislike. It's a gay rights ploy to paint anyone who dislikes the gay agenda as afraid. Just more PC thought control through language.

Maybe you should try and come up with a word because that’s the only word there is to describe someone who dislikes gays. Actually homophobic is correct for religious based disapproval of homosexuals. It’s the fear if you don’t openly object to homosexuals you will incur Gods wrath again.

I have a pet peeve for a groups struggle to not be discriminated against being described as an “agenda”.

Seems appropriate for any movement to me regardless of their desired result. Exactly what did you think "agenda" means?

The word agenda implies a plan by a person or a group. If used by a person or group to describe a person or a group that they dislike it implies a subversive or harmful plan objective. It also belittles the person or groups struggle by saying it’s a mere agenda. Don’t take my word for it walk up to black guy and describe the black races fight for equality as the “black agenda”, he’ll explain it to you.

Aaaah, so an objection based upon moral or religious grounds must be based upon fear? I suppose that means that if someone refuses to fight in a war or objects to that war based upon moral or religious beliefs it's really an objection based upon fear?

Yes, fear of what they think might happen to their soul. I’ve heard the story of Sodom & Gomorrah brought up in a sermon about the evils of homosexuality many times.

I really hate the wanton misuse of the term "homophobic". Phobic means "fear", not dislike.

Not quite. The Greek word phobia is derived from φόβος (phobos), which in its original Homeric sense meant flight, or panic. (Interestingly Greek seems to have as many different words for fear as for love). The modern English word 'phobia' means an intense fear, dislike or aversion. Now, with homophobia there is certainly dislike and aversion, but it is quite arguable that fear is lurking somewhere there too, at least according to the good Dr. Freud . (Even if not, two out of three is enough to make -phobia appropriate).

It seems your pet peeve has come about because you have mixed up two quite different things. One is opposition to the 'gay agenda', which as you rightfully say might well come about through principled ethical or religious motives, rather than any hatred or fear. The other thing, which certainly also exists, is an irrational dislike, aversion - and yes, usually fear - that causes some people to behave with malice and sometimes extreme violence towards homosexuals.

In your defence, it has sometimes seemed that some gay rights activists deliberately confuse the two things in order to, for example, tar principled religious conservatives with the same brush as the kind of scum that brutally murdered Matthew Shephard.

I think it is useful to make the distinction between those who have a principled religious or philosophical opposition to homosexuality, with which I disagree but with which I can at least argue rationally, and those homophobes, who motivated by fear, dislike and aversion, express their feeling (rather than thought) through a range of unkindness beginning at the verbal level and sometimes ending with sickening violence. I think this useful distinction is something that both you and certain gay rights militants ought to acknowledge.

He believed that you should stick to your own. A belief that many people share with him

I do not think he is a racist at all. I had a Professor, a Hoale Professor who believed in the sort of things yoyr Father believes. But he was the fairest and the most decent human being I have ever met. Unlike LIBERALS who are just hyprcrites such men stand up for their beliefs. So quit calling you father a racist. He is not. Old fashioned may be, but not a racist.

Hoale

I really despise that word (haole). I find it very much akin to the "n word" only directed toward white people. It's a hateful word.

I really despise that word (haole). I find it very much akin to the "n word" only directed toward white people. It's a hateful word.

OK No offence intended. I went to Grad School at UH Manoa and picked up that slang. I do not think it carries the same sot of undertones as the other word.

It is somewhat human nature to categorize people, especially ones we don't know.

And I don't think it is crazy to categorize a group of people by color (ie Negros, then blacks, then African Americans). Any more than it is to do it by a group's behavior.

Your dad doesn't think races should mix. But when actually confronted with a mixed race child, what does he do? He loves it to pieces. Hmmmmm.

So he had some preconceived ideas. Who doesn't?

Sally you categorize your own dad as a homophobic racist. To me that is way harsher than anything your dad has said. Why? Because he was saying those things against an "unknown" group of people..and upon meeting those said groups, acted as a true family man and neighbor.

You are his daughter and have no problems calling him a lovely man and a homophobic racist. Do you see a double standard here?

does not wanting to socialize with a group of people make one a racist? or does it mean that they just have preferences?

Maybe you should try and come up with a word because that’s the only word there is to describe someone who dislikes gays.

Hmmm.....How about Bigots?

Spouts the line, but when confronted with real people, he sees real people. While not perfect, at least it is a start. And for the older generation, a great compromise.

Yes I agree, and I was trying to show his good side out of this article....

That he raised 2 great girls is a testament that the cycle is breakable and is being broken.

Thanks Doc, that comment is much appreciated!