Antecipation is killing you (Literally)? WE HAVE THE SOLUTION! The Survivor's Guide To GalCiv II Launch is the ultimate answer for the expected problems that might be faced during the release of the game! If you are suffering from psychosis, hemorrhoid, intense headache, Drengin Berserkgangr, stress, F5 Syndrome (Related to the futile attempts to refresh GalCiv2 page for any news), insomnia, upset stomach, Chuck Norris idolatry (with good reasons), Norris Syndrome (Related to the fact that the affected can ultimately PWN THE HECK OUT OF YOU if another individual annoys him enough), liking your work (Argh), Turn Based Game "One More Turn" Syndrome, WoW "Just One More Level" Malaise (also comes in the "Just One More Quest" and "Just One More Hour" versions), diarrhea, Wardellian Hate and insanity?
WE CAN HELP YOUH!!!!1!1!onetwoon!eleven!
"The Survivor's Guide To The GalCiv II Launch", written by the makers of "The Survivor's Guide To Civ4 Ownage", "The Survivor's Guide To Battlefield 2 Obliteration", "How To Be Not Negative In SimCity4 Even When You Are Going To Complete Bankrupcy" and the Nobel-winning "The Most Obviously Necessary Guide To World Of Warcraft Gaming", is the final way to keep your sanity during these last hours preceding the release of the game. Inscribed upon the cover, the legendary phrase "DON'T PANIC!" in big, friendly letters are sure to catch your attention. And just because we are a nice bunch of corporate capitalists, a SMALL FRACTION of this book is available here! FOR FREE************! A quick method to rapidly save yourself (and buy our book, ahem), it shall demonstrate the obvious positive effects given to those who read the Guide!
"...To immediately counter the issues caused by the anxiety of the release, please direct yourself to page 199 where a 12 steps guide is offered to swiftly resore your health condition."
Isn't amazing? Buy now the Survivor's Guide To GalCiv II Launch, and endure the probations!! (US$ 59,90 in your nearest bookstore.)
************ - That doesn't mean that you can go anywhere and distribute our content, jackass. AND YES, you know who I am talking to.